A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Office

I got canned. Axed. Sacked. Made redundant. Laid off. Position eliminated.

Not that I didn't see it coming. I did.

Not that it wasn't in some sense a relief. It was.

Tuesday mornings aren't the slow grinding dread of meeting with an orangutang to go over progress on a project nobody is really interested in because, like a collection of children they have a blanky, a bowl of food and a place to crap. So what if the thing is always late, we always get away with it.

Unemployment nirvana. There's just one problem. There always is.

I got another job.

The next day.

Ointment without a fly simply does not exist for me. Not that I'm complaining, but really, could I at least go through a respectable period of unemployment. Just to get a sense of the thing. I now have a booklet of unemployment insurance rules, a payment calculation and a week wherein to post my first claim.

I also have an employment contract to sign.

So much for being the iconoclastic writer type who takes long walks through town, talks to a lot of people and taps away at a laptop on the front porch of the coffee shop he used to own, working on his second novel.

Now its off to Brooks Brothers for a new suit and some white shirts, pick the laptop to use, figure out the Blackberry and dive headlong into corporate America.

But I am thankful and there are folks who've lost their job and have gone through a personal hell before they picked themselves back up. They have my respect and admiration. I've not been there yet and haven't made it this time and am frankly scared out of my wits that I would have the gumption to pick up the pieces and begin anew. This time I got lucky and when I get lucky I tend to want to share that luck. Being that I have to assemble a staff, I got on the phone and offered a job to one of the most deserving and qualified people I know. They turned me down but had a hard time doing so. The opportunity was great, the money outstanding but the commute was hell. At the very least though, they know they have options.

I start in a couple of weeks. Been doing legwork all this week, travelling to customer sites, plant locations and so forth. If this is joblessness, could I go back to work? It was easier.

I'll see you shortly. My schedule is going to put me in a lot of hotel rooms with time to kill. I'll go corporate, at least for a few years, but I'll never stop bunnying.

Bunny on.

Thanks for listening.